Friday, January 14, 2011

Commuter Terrorists - The PA Pusher

If I had to pick the commuter terrorist I hate the most, it must be this one I am about to discuss. Although I find the Hanger, the Crotch Presser and the Battering Ram highly unpleasant to deal with when they are encountered, at least I can understand the motivation for their actions (OK, well, maybe not a deliberate crotch presser), but the Passive-Aggressive Pusher is probably the one I hate the most since he (they are exclusively male) knows exactly what he's doing but doesn't really have much to gain but cause other people grievance.

This nasty type of Commuter Terrorist doesn't like the crowds in the commute and so far I'm all with him, the problem is that this guy hates the crowds so much that he does everything in his power to increase the space he has available on behalf of the other commuters. A typical scenario where this guy (usually a pretty large man as well in terms of body size) is encountered is on a crowded train where you end up in the corridor of the train (see my previous graph here, the place I'm talking about is the one marked in orange) and it is crowded, but not to the extreme. There might be some very light crotch-pressing going on, but nothing serious, but this guy won't stand for it. With all his might he will push with his back trying to make his own space bigger, aggressively pushing you towards the man/woman on the opposite side and not letting up. I have never really understood how these guys think, because due to their actions, they create an unpleasant scenario for themselves (because they have to keep pushing backwards), the victim (who has to try to stand against the constant pressure of the PA Pusher) and the person on the other side (who gets pushed by the PA Pusher by proxy).

I think that these guys are the prime reason for the outbursts of train rage that sometimes plague the commute. But there can be even worse scenarios, on one or two occasions have I found myself in between two PA Pushers on either side of me, usually the only solution is to try to slip out from between them and let them take it out on each other. But the worst case scenario is when a Battering Ram enters and forces you up against the PA Pusher; it's a case of finding oneself stuck between an unstoppable force and an immovable object...

3 comments:

Generic Jen B said...

Women do this too! At least they do it to other women. They use their handbags by hoisting them up on their shoulder and then they purposefully press it into you, especially when you are holding onto the rings. Every time I check our reflections lined up in the window, I can see that the PA handbag bitches have ample space. They are sour little harridans. I hate them with passion.

*goes to lie down*

Eva said...

Oh! I experienced the rush hour once!!! (because I stay in my school dorm...) My friend and I were laughing hysterically non-stop for two stations because we were so amazed by how squeezed up we can become. Anyway, I hope that there's no more 2nd time! (PS. Thanks for the endorsement! :)

Mr. Salaryman said...

Jen B - I can actually fully believe that! I guess it's even worse for girls since you get targeted by both the male and the female PA Pushers. I guess that most women realize that being a PA Pusher towards a mid- to large size man can cause more trouble than benefits. But I fully understand your hatred, a PA pusher is a PA pusher, even if it's handbag they use as tool!

Eva - Oh, that's actually another type of commuter terrorist you are! The "oh how exciting it is to experience the rush hour once just to see how it is"! I'll post about that later on ;)

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