Monday, June 27, 2011

The Foreign Boyfriend Pt. 2

A beloved illegal Alien
(Check here for part 1 of this story) the topic of Chieko's new boyfriends skin color had been finished, the questions now turned to the slightly more controversial topics of the boyfriends; 1. Illegal Alien status 2. Future career prospects and ability to support a family 3. 12 year age difference. At a first glance, it might look like three completely disconnected issues, but for the conspiratory minded it kinda creates an interesting scenario as A) Single Japanese women in their upper 30's are known to be more eager to get hitched, B) One way to possibly get a legal visa to Japan is to marry a Japanese woman (and even better, have a baby). 
Considering that Chieko is known as a really nice girl/lady who sometimes is a bit naive and think the best of everyone, the general atmosphere in the group was that of strong skepticism. One of Mrs. Sunshine's girlfriends, Rie, is also very well known for completely lacking any form of checkpoint between her brain and her mouth and always ready to give her opinion any topic, she immediately took the lead in the interrogation which was something like this:

Rie: (with an extremely skeptical frown) How did you meet this dude to begin with?!
Chieko: (still with an air of happiness, not yet picking up on the general skepticism) A friend introduced us, she thought we would be such a great match.
Rie: (seems shocked) A friend? Introduce you to this guy, who's an illegal alien and working with garbage disposal and thought you would be a good match?
Chieko: (looking a bit confused) ...yes?
Rie: (bursts out laughing and pours herself another glass of wine) No! That's not a friend, that's something else (laughing to herself)
Mrs. Sunshine: (chips in as Chieko looks like she's about to burst into tears) Look Chieko, maybe you should just take it very slowly and not rush into things, he might just be out after a visa...
Chieko: (eyes red) yeah, you are probably... (interrupted)
Rie: (finished laughing but very eager) So wait a minute, why did he come to Japan in the first place?!
Chieko: (looking like a deer caught in the headlights of an 18tn truck) He came for his career...
Rie: (basically spraying out the wine in her mouth laughing) A career as an illegal immigrant working with garbage disposal?! 
Chieko: (bursting into tear, sobbing) yes... (trying to say something more but keeps crying)
Mr. Salaryman: (trying to calm things down) Look, it's probably a pretty horrible job, but compared to what he can make in his own country it might be a lot of money so I can understand that
Chieko: (still crying, nodding)
Rie: (softening up a little as she seem to realize that she should ease up a little) Do you love him enough to be willing to go to Mali and live with him?
Chieko: (temporarily stopping crying) Maybe, I don't know...
Mr. Salaryman: (can't help it as I've been playing with my iPad and reading up on Mali) Oh, look, I hardly knew this country, here's some quick facts (reads up some pretty depressing statistics on the situation of Mali)
Chieko: (starts crying again)
Mr. Salaryman: (zooming in on the area with google earth and showing her) Wow, there's not much there is it? Mostly desert it seems like...

After that the situation got a bit calmer with more advice on taking it very slow and be a bit careful and make sure she really loves him etc. etc. I also managed to squeeze in that we knew a very good lawyer that might be able to help them if they decided to get hitched and needed some help with the visa (Mrs. Sunshine went back and forth afterwards as to whether that was a mean joke on my side or a legitimate good recommendation. In the end she settled on it being a bit mean but possibly actually helpful). 

That's the exciting story of the foreign boyfriend. I'm looking forward to getting continuous updates on the progress from Mrs. Sunshine.  

(Disclaimer: For the sake of fairness, I don't know the dude and he might be the greatest most honorable man, just trying his best to make a living in Japan to support his family and now accidentally had came upon his true love here in Japan.)


Mr. S. said...

So many of these stories! A certain portion of the women here are not unintelligent, but entirely uncritical. The first time it hit home was when I told a young woman she was "naïve" not to know that men have nipples (long story), and her answer was "I'm 'naïve'? Thank you!"

My wife's second cousin just got rid of a European husband after a decade together, and kept the child in Japan, of course. He's been here all that time, learned no Japanese, insisted on only his language in the home (Français, bien sûr), hated everything about Japanese food and culture, was stereotypically French about the superiority of France's, and often had his similar friends from home stay for long periods. Did I mention he never got a job here?

It took her ten years.

Akira&Taiga said...

I can't believe how so many of the fellow Japanese ladies are naive. (but don't tell them they are naive, as Japanese 'naive' means 'pure hearted' or 'innocent'. More positive meaning than English meaning. ) I kinda understand this sort of scenarios were happening a lot about 20 years ago, at the end of the Bubble. But I just don't get that these things are still happening when they can obtain the 'facts' on their fingertips. Anyway I encounter lots of those naive ladies in overseas as well. I see so many married couples with non-Japanese hubbies not have jobs. The usual story is that they separated after a couple of kids. Very sad.

Chris said...

Women are brutal.....I would much rather be punched in the face repeatedly than have passive aggressive stuff hurled at me until I crawled into an emotional ball and started on an anti depression pill regimen....brutal!!

Loving the ipad2!!!

Try the McIntosh audio player instead of itunes...fucking gorgeous!!

kathrynoh said...

Maybe it's not about being naive but more about her biological clock?

Martin said...

My gosh! your disclaimer was a bit naive ;-P

RMilner said...

It is pretty crappy to be born in a country where becoming an illegal immigrant somewhere else is a positive career move.

I wonder how he got all the way to Japan?

That says something about his drive and adaptability, regardless of his motivations towards Rie.

Mr. S. said...

Martin, she was underage (well, under 18, but over 14 - which is the age of consent in her Saitama) so it was certainly not in an intimate moment, though I can see how my story coud be implied that way...

Fernando said...

He may be an honorable man yes, lawful and all...but what are the odds?
Rie is one of those types of friends who helps buold character to they fellow comrades...either you build character and love her or be a softie and hate her lol

BiggerInJapan said...

...and on the Seventh Day he said: let there be babies! And so it happened, and all was good.

le sigh.

Rydangel said...

Ok. I don't know what to say. She should bitchslap the friend who introduced her to a broke illegal alien. His being black shouldn't be a problem. But interracial relationships will have different issues, than those with the same culture/ethnicity. She should find out why he couldn't enter the country legally. Could she be charged with a crime if he gets caught and she married him knowing he was illegal? Is she ok being the primary breadwinner, having dark-skinned kids, facing familial and socital disapproval? If she has any doubts she should keep him in the "mr. right now"instead of "mr. right" category. If her clock is ticking she should go for match making. But as a woman she should try to marry up, or at least aim for a man with a steady job with health benefits and a 401k.

aimlesswanderer said...

I would also suggest she be cautious. Perhaps get her friends to meet him, so they can get a better idea of what he's like. Friends and relatives are normally right (once they meet the person), and they are often a bit more objective than the person involved.

I love how you gave your favorite immigration lawyer, who is used to dealing with "unusual" cases a plug. You should get a kick back, or they should get a discount! Actually, no, there might be a lot of work involved in this case.

Hanta said...

I'd never marry a Japanese woman (no offence). My Japanese is shite and I need to communicate fully with the person I'm going out with. Also, I don't trust them with kids as I've heard far too many stories of gaijin fathers not being able to see their kids or have them stolen from them.

Magenta Violette said...

I hope everything works out for her. Maybe he entered Japan legally under some kind of a sports scholarship and then over-stayed his visa?

sumgai said...

While he might be a good guy, any African country has too different of a work ethic and culture to fit into Japan...I mean into anything else than garbage sorting or entertainment. Can be the case of complete opposites attracting but sounds like just a way out for the Mali guy.
As other have said, I'm too amazed how decent Japanese women pick husbands who are dirt poor and/or not educated, isn't really healthy for the future of Japan as their offspring will have problems.
That said, I'm pretty flaky financially myself.

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